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Your Hawaii Bowl Holiday Guide, featuring Michael Floyd, Phil Keoghan and Mike Haywood

It goes without saying that the Hawaii Rainbow Warriors had to fill a lot of holes after last year's undefeated regular season and Sugar Bowl thrashing (We've been there, guys; No shame.).  Colt Brennan went onto the NFL where he put up some impressive preseason stats for the Redskins while June Jones took the money and ran all the way to Dallas, where he's in Year One of a rebuilding program at SMU.  You probably are not aware that Miami Dolphin rookie receiver Davone Bess was on the other end of some of Brennan's record-breaking throws, or that he serves as an example that you might be able to find a receiver a little later down in the draft and don't, under any circumstances, have to draft TED GINN, JR., IN THE TOP TEN JUST BECAUSE MAYBE THE TEXANS WERE GOING TO MAYBE TAKE HIM WITH THE NEXT PICK.  Sigh. 

After losing so much from the 2007 squad, Hawaii struggled at the beginning of the season, with road trips to Gainesville and Corvalis helping to stunt the rebuilding.  Things took a turn for the better with an upset win at Fresno State in early October, with the rest of the season going according to plan save for dropping a game at woeful Utah State and nearly pulling the upset off against Cincinnati in the season finale.  The Warriors were a better home team than road team, although the fact they faced Florida, Oregon State and Boise State on the road while feasting on the likes of Washington State and Idaho at home probably contributed to this discrepancy as much as any sort of home cooking or road troubles. 

Just looking at the meat-and-potatoes statistics, nothing initially jumps out about the Warriors.  69th in scoring offense, with the 108th ranked rushing attack and 33rd ranked passing attack.  72nd in scoring defense, 72nd at stopping the run and 54th at slowing the pass.  The two things they're not particularly good at are keeping drives going (91st in third down conversions) and keeping young Greg Alexander, or whoever is playing quarterback, on his feet (last in the entire nation in sacks allowed).

There's your basic rundown.  Now, things you need to know for the upcoming holiday:

The Irish Are Going To Need To Block This Guy: Meet David Veikune, defensive end for the Rainbow Warriors and legitimate NFL draft prospect.   After a relatively slow start to the season, Veikune ended up with 64 tackles, 15 tackles for loss, 8 sacks and 4 forced fumbles.  You can see him raining down hell on hapless WAC opponents while a TRL favorite blasts in the background here:


After a 2007 season where they couldn't stop anybody from getting to the quarterback, the Irish made it through most of 2008 without facing too many elite pass-rushers.  That will change Wednesday evening. 

Also worth blocking?  Hawaii linebacker Solomon Elimimian, the all-time leading tackler in Rainbow Warrior history and your 2008 WAC Defensive Player of the Year.   The man knows what he is talking about.  

Where the best holiday marathons are:  Everyone loves opening gifts, watching fantastic NBA games and hanging out with their family and watching Elf for the ninth time (that is a good thing), but sometimes you just want to zone out in front of the television for hours at a time and just take in whatever the glowing box of happiness is willing to give you.  Here's a comprehensive list of what to find there from the 24th to the 26th.  Highlights?    

MTV on the 24th: Engaged and Underaged/True Life.  This is worth watching only to see if True Life: I'm A High School Senior is on.  It originally aired in 2003, I believe, and contains two of the greatest hours of anything you will ever watch.  Second only to the Made in which the preppy girlie-girl learns how to do a back-flip on a BMX bike in regards to best episodes of 21st century MTV programming.

Spike on the 24th and 25th: James Bond Films.  The only really great one on Christmas Eve is You Only Live Twice in the morning, which features the worst ninjas you've ever seen, Sean Connery turning Japanese and the original volcano hideout.   Christmas Day is much, much better, with Dr. No, From Russia With Love and Goldfinger.  Timothy Dalton is conspicuously absent from both days, while Die Another Day somehow airs twice, because you just can't get enough invisible cars.

Game Show Network on the 25th: Card Sharks.  Really just an all-time fantastic game show that would be fantastic for bringing back today (Ben Silverman, are you listening?  More cheap programming!).  You had contestants taking guesses at awkward social questions, some eye candy and gambling in the final round.  It would, without question, translate 100% into an hour format on primetime hosted by Jeff Probst.

TV Land on the 25th: Christmas episodes of old shows.  These all seem like winners to me.     

Animal Planet on the 26th: Whale Wars.  I have no idea what this is, but it sounds amazing.

Travel Channel on the 26th: The Amazing Race 13.  TAR, despite winning heaps and heaps of worthless Emmys, does not get enough credit for how consistently entertaining it is.  This season started off really slow, with some ill-formed legs and incompetent competitors, but business picked up and resulted in some of the worst attempts at completing Road Blocks and Detours in the history of the program.  The criminally underrated Phil Keoghan, who can dance like a fiend:


What this game might resemble defensively:  After perusing a lot of Rainbow Warrior offensive linemen quotes, it seems they are well aware that everyone is point to the large amount of sacks they've given up this season as one of the biggest themes coming into the game.  While those numbers will certainly be tempting Pat Kuntz and friends, I can't help but think that the game film from the opener with the Aztecs is going to be studied extensively by the Hawaii coaching staff as a great way of dealing with the Tenuta blitzes while keeping the Irish offense off the field.  (I write the end of that previous sentence imagining that it's still 2005 and people are concerned about stopping the Notre Dame offense.  St. Michael protect us!) 

What will that mean?  Potentially huge days for David Bruton and Kyle McCarthy, who will have loads of crossing routes, shovel passes and screens to deal with over the course of the evening.  It could also mean some fun for the outside linebackers crashing in from the outside, which is one way Bob Davie (?) helped stunt the growth of the Run and Shoot offense.

Michael Floyd and Brian Smith will be back: An issue not brought up nearly enough is how the regression of the entire Irish team was expediated by the loss of Floyd.  Even in the losses to North Carolina and Pitt, the offense looked at least competent, putting up points on capable teams (I don't even want to think about the Boston College game; mulligan?).  Against Navy, the game where Floyd left very early on, the Irish did the majority of their damage on the ground.  From that point on, Jimmy Clausen and the entire offense struggled to string any sort of success together.  The Tribune point out that after Floyd left, the Irish passing offense dipped from 259 to 147.  In the preseason, we all thought Floyd was going to be something really special.  In an odd twist when it comes to preseason hype, he exceeded everyone's wildest dreams before being taken from us for the last three games of the season, sending everything and everyone into a venomous tailspin of finger-pointing and griping.

While I'm not going to get my hopes too high, what if Floyd's return just makes everything magically better?  Golden Tate will be able to get open, there will never be a safety in the box and Clausen will have a freak athlete to just toss bombs to anytime the defense foolishly leaves only one defender on him.    

On defense, Smith was the vocal and physical leader on the field before a bum knee cut him down as well.  Although the defense had still been playing well in his absence, it'll be good to have him back, if only for quotes like this:

"We were out walking around (Saturday) night, going in all the expensive stores - Louis Vuitton, Armani Exchange," linebacker Brian Smith said. "I saw a coat for about $1,700. I said, this is not the store I need to be in. This is not coming home with me."

Mike Haywood is out of there: As Rob mentioned below, ESPN is reporting that the Irish offensive coordinator is heading east to coach Miami (OH).

 

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